Spider (sjspider) wrote,


Someone has signed me up with an internet gay personals site. I've been getting e-mails all week.
I will find you.

Got an e-mail from my friend Chuck.
"I can't imagine you out in the wilderness" he said.

I'm from the City. I have always lived in cities. I love the high buildings. I love being in the tops of those buildings, staring down at neverending traffic and doing wildcrazy drugs with other city people. So now I'm out here, living in an old house on top of a mountain. My back yard dips down into a little valley where sometimes I can see deer from my back porch. The nearest store is at the foot of the mountain. The nearest real town (by which I mean, the nearest town with a Wal-Mart) is twenty-five minutes from here. The house needs tons of work. I'm still planning to make Fort Spider a grim reality.
There are challenges, and this is not my milieu.

Running water up here is kind of hit or miss. It's strange. Got cable fucking TV, but the water is a little sketchy. The power will go out if it rains. Things are dirty.

Some of my friends don't think I'm up to this. They think I'll become exhausted and dirty and get high and say "fuck all this." Fuck all this dirtyness, fuck this lack of running water, fuck this long, neverending trip to the store, fuck this "roughing it."

I've been a junkie.
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